In a recent discussion I participated on over at The Elizabethan Lady's LJ, I encountered someone who maintained that 9.9 out of 10 SCA peers were suck-ups who kissed ass to get their awards. All I felt I could say in response was "Ouch!" It seemed pointless to argue with her; she'd made up her mind, what could I say to dissuade her? It's true, some people in the SCA, peers or not, are practiced bootlickers who constantly curry favor with the Powers That Be. I know that I didn't do that to earn my accolade, no one did that on my behalf, and my friends who are peers didn't engage in that sort of thing either. Nor did I pretend to be somebody I'm not to gain approval.
One lesson I've learned in the past few years is that there is no way that everyone will like me. It's pointless to attempt a 100% approval rating. In the real world, people judge me by my appearance, what I'm wearing, how I talk, my sex, my race. I can't be all good things to all the people I encounter. Inside the confines of the SCA, people judge me based on the type of costumes I wear, who I associate with, and, when they see my Laurel's medallion, they are going to make assumptions about me based on what they think of the order. They also might judge me based on what they may have heard about me. For a while, it bothered me a little that other people (or, to be more accurate, one person) out there talk(s) trash about my friends and I to anyone who might listen, as a recent Google of "House Sinister" Trimaris found. But if people are foolish enough to accept one person's opinion without bothering to get the other side of the story, that reflects poorly on them, not me. It also makes the trash-talker look petty after a while. So, life lesson, be yourself, some people will like you, others will not, most won't have an opinion either way. As Dr. Phil once said, "If we only knew how seldom people thought of us, their opinion wouldn't worry us" - well, he said something like that.
Oh, and if you believe that "Oops I meant that to be a private message" excuse, I've got some prime Everglades real estate I think you'd be interested in purchasing.
